Stamped: July 28th, 2005 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: complaint dept., mom, neuroses.
Similarly tagged posts
- Oy, My Tits!
- My Mother Found My Website*
- Hell is for Children
- How are you? No really, how are you?
- Vagina, I Curse Thee
- So you think you know Meme?
- Summertime Blues
- Round Two...
- Spank me, I'm a bitch
- Complaint Department
- Confession of the Week
- Ex-Girlfriend for a Day
- And That, My Friend, Is All There Is
- Dates of Yore
- Ice Ice Baby
- the Alphabet can Be so Cruel
- Confession of the Week
- Wild Abandon
- The Six Thirty Date
- A Momentary Lapse In Judgement
- Lying To The Girl You Fuck. Fa la la la la
- Solution Blonde
- OK, She Fainted. Can We Move On Yet??
- Aghast at Abercrombie & Fitch
- Hold The Dirty Talk If You Want A Piece Of Me
- Confucius Says...
- Please Don’t Be Nice
- Reader 'D' -- This One's For You
- losing my patience and my hard-on
- My Milanese Life Obliterated
- Man And The Forbidden Pussy
- My Waiting Room Epiphany
- Jerk Off For Weight Loss?? My Ass!!
- To The Guy Who Almost Broke My Rose-Colored Glasses
- my online dating man list
- Mama don't Preach
- Keep Your Enemies Close & Relatives Self-Contained
- At Least I'm Cute
- An Open Letter To The Bitch Who Recently Waxed My Brows
- shouldn't be ashamed
- I (am falling out of) Love (with) NY
- Under heart-shaped pressure
- Have you seen this girl?
- GA
- Oh yeah? Fuck you too.
- Breaking News: Stupidity Abounds
- On leaving well enough alone
- those aren't freckles
- Hi, I'm Brandy Crawford.
- Intelligent Design?
- Budget Vans are Funny
- Lo's Weekly Rant: I Call Bullshit.
- Yes, We Have No Bananas
- Lo's Church of Unattainable Men: Part Deux
- Baby Jane gets laid
- Children are the future (aka I think my ovaries just shrivelled up and fell off)
- Give me your best O face
- Lo's Weekly Sob Fest
- A Girl's Best Friend
- Lo's Weekly....Whatever.
- Cumming on his face vs Cumming in his heart.
- Top Five People Screwing Up Girlspokia
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- To My Lovely Neighbor
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Yes, You Do Look Fat in That
- A debate yet to be debated
- Odd Female Behavior: The Bachelorette Party
- When In Rome
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Some days it doesn't pay to even get out of bed
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- I Don't Get It
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Subway Rage
- Speaking of Porn...
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Let Me Explain...again.
- Lo's Weekly Rant
- Let Me Explain...
- How (not) to...
- Happy Valentine's Day Bitches
- Girlspoke Dumping Service™
- Scratching the Surface
- The 135th Post, Hoss
- Meme's Last Blog Will and Testament
- Today's Post Will Have the Most Insulting Comments Ever
- Mr. New York, Wherever You Are
- Why I Hate You
- We are now entering the Doldrums
- Are You My Future Husband?
- Put that on a Post-It, bitch.
- A Moment In Time
- Server Issues
- Road Rage
- Not in My Panties
- The perils of an American call centre girl in England
- FOOD ME
- Put Your Best Foot Forward
- In A Family Way
- The joys of leaving home
- Something you should know about me first
- http://love.google.com
- My Ill-Shapen Malformed Ears
- Alone Together
- Baby You Can Drive My Car
- Riddle Me This
- Sometimes you feel like a nut...
- And The Winner Is...
- Zip Me Up, Zip Me Down
- All by myself...don't wanna be..all by myself
- ♫ Won't you be my neighbor ♫
- I ♥ Nutella™
- Exercises in Futility
The other day I was reading an entry on Lauren's blog about vivid dreaming and I was reminded of my own nocturnal psychosis.
You see, I'm very picky about my sleep. I have deeply ingrained patterns and habits. For example, I can only fall asleep spread-eagle on my stomach - as though I had been caught by the police and forced to lie down on the sidewalk for a search - of course, minus the handcuffs (well…). I also CANNOT have my feet under the covers, but I like the bottom of my sheet tucked in, so to achieve this I have to free my feet via the sides of the sheet. You probably realize by now that in order to maintain this position it's required that no one else be in my bed.
But most importantly, I like waking up fairly early, early enough to sit around for twenty minutes post-preparation and drink my coffee, check my email, read pink is the new blog, etc. I hate having to rush. I usually forget something running out the door and on approximately 3 occasions it was my keys. More than anything I just hate being late.
You can imagine my relief the other morning when as the alarm was sounding my mother walked in my room and said "don't worry honey, I'll take care of everything, you just keep snoozing your alarm." I didn't occur to me at the time to question the fact that my mother lives 3000 miles away. So, of course, I snoozed my alarm and when I awoke that trickster was nowhere to be found.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
Interestingly enough, when my alarm went off this morning I was elated as Pauly D told me over the video phone on my ceiling that it was Saturday and I should turn that darn thing off. Though, it did seem odd at the time that Pauly was wearing a rainbow clown wig and busting some crazy krumping moves.
Last 5 posts by Meme
Dreamin’ a Dream of You
i think seeing anyone bust a move while wearing a wig would terrify me into consciousness. either that, or i’d be so amused that i’d linger in dreamworld a bit longer to make fun of them. those are the dangerous dreams that entice you to keep hitting snooze, even when you’re slightly coherent enough to keep hitting the button.
and, btw, i think i totally used to have those little smurf figures!! i’m experiencing a bit of deja vu.
I had those Smurf figures, too! And then I sold them for tons of money and used the profits to buy ONE TACO AT TACO BELL.
They weren’t worth that much.