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Betty The wonderful thing about Tiggers

Stamped: September 18th, 2005 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: , , .

My vibrator died. But I’ve been reluctant to purchase a new one for nostalgic reasons. This vibrator was my first. Given to me by a college roommate for Christmas, she is sleek and tiger striped and well loved (the vibrator, not the ex-college roommate, not that I didn’t like my college roommate, but yeah, ok, you get the idea…). I named her Tigger I refer to her as “her” because she is far too attractive and too adept to be called a man. I even gave her a theme song, or rather stole a theme song for her from A. A. Milne, which fits rather frighteningly well for a children’s song.

“The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful things
Their tops are made out of rubber
Their bottoms are made out of springs
They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I'm the only one

The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful chaps
They're loaded with vim and with vigor
They love to leap in your laps
They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I'm the only one.

Tiggers are wonderful fellahs.
Tiggers are awfully sweet.
Everyone else is jealous,
And that’s why I repeat…

The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Are Tiggers are wonderful things
Their tops are made out of rubber
Their bottoms are made out of springs
They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I'm the only one.
Yes, I'm the only one
(GRRrrrrrr…) ooOOoooOOooooOOOO!!!”

My tigger has gotten me through some tough times; she’s scared men off just as much as she’s helped me to lure them into my boudoir. But alas, I fear we must part.

So, fabulous Girlspoke devotees, I call to you for orgasmic advice. Can you help me find a vibrator as good as my dear Tigger?

To help you out, here is the personal ad:

SWF in search of a unique and tireless vibrator for “me” time. No cutesy, frilly or glow-in-the-dark vibes need apply. Waterproof accepted. 6 inch and over. MUST BE BRAND NEW. Theme song not required, but would be a plus.

Last 5 posts by Betty


10 Responses to The wonderful thing about Tiggers


Comments

  • That is scary how well that story fits! If you want to find a good replacement, check out the reviews at www.clitical.org

    Posted by Steve # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • it was hard for me to move on from my first, which I broke the plug on (don’t ask). but now i have jimmy, and jimmy has built-in heat with a flip of the switch.

    Posted by Meme # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • I was in a bar with a friend of mine today trying to explain this post to her (I haven’t yet convinced her of the value of slumming through blogs).

    My inability to convey the essence of the post was due to, 1) discussing vibes without blushing (though in a bar, who notices?), 2) a limited familiarity with said devices, 3) a shit-ass memory that couldn’t remember the words to “The wonderful thing about Tiggers.”

    But this post was damn funny.

    Posted by Bill # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • You have discovered a whole new level of online personals. Congratulations!

    Posted by T.A.B. # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • Bill,

    It was nice reading you……too bad you wrote “slumming through blogs” in reference to girlspoke.

    Girls be nice, make it quick and painless………… :-)

    Posted by Dave # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • “Slumming” is only a negative if you’re passing through the wrong places. Otherwise, it’s a nice way of getting familiar with the local culture without having it sifted through a filter. When you “slum,” you get more grit and with more grit, you get more truth.

    And the people are a helluva lot more interesting.

    So when I say “slumming” in this context, it ain’t no slight. Just the opposite.

    Posted by Bill # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • Good catch their Bill!!! I’m impressed! ;-)

    Posted by Dave # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • Meme - Built in heat?…I am intrigued.

    Posted by Betty # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • I swear by the waterproof Pocket Rocket: doesn’t intimidate the guy, packs a lot of horsepower, and is exceptionally portable.

    Posted by Avatar # 2 years, 7 months ago
  • Portable is good. A real woman never knows when she’s going to need a quick fix

    Posted by Betty # 2 years, 7 months ago

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