The Girlspoke Pillow Fight™, December 2005
Stamped: December 7th, 2005 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: Pillow Fight™.
Welcome to the first ever Girlspoke Pillow Fight™, where we toss the proverbial pillow at you, each other, and whomever happens to be in the way. The first Wednesday of every month we will be bringing you high quality banter while we attempt to dissect everyday images. Call it deconstructionism, call it gibberish, call your mother, but we've got our hands on the intellectual pulse of the nation, the world, the whole fucking blogoverse. So without further ado….
Betty: A really pissed off Bullwinkle, or is it Rocky? Whatever - that moose looks really mad.
Jenna: No way, Betty Crocker. That's clearly Janet Jackson's fucking nipple ring.
Casey: Oh, that's where it went to. Now, we know what's on Jenna's mind.
Jenna: mmm…nipple rings.
Lexie: You know what I don't get? People that only pierce one of their nipples. WTF?
Meme: They obviously don't understand the importance of symmetry in evolution and the propagation of species.
Jenna: He with the solitary nipple piercing wouldn't last a night with me. I'd bite him into symmetry if I had to. I'm anal about that kind of thing.
Meme: You're anal…hehe…you said anal.
Lexie: You know when you wake up and you notice on your sheets that you got your period overnight? Yeah, it doesn't look like that.
Meme: I don't know about you, but this immediately reminded me of the Turkish toilets so popular in Europe. The ones that are just porcelain pits in the ground with foot markers that inevitably cause major splashback onto those gorgeous leather boots you just bought.
Casey: Wait a minute…this is the work of some woman's period? Very talented! I definitely see a woman peeing standing up.
Jenna: Turkish toilets?! I had to google that one. I think it looks like a guy's ass and sac print. Not that I would know what that looks like.
Lexie: Have you seen the toilets in Japan? Same fucking thing.
Meme: Jenna, you've been taking too many alternative art courses.
Jenna: Heh. Weird, that's what I tell my mom they are, too.
Lexie: Your mom (haha, your MOM) actually falls for that?
Jenna: Oh yeah? Well, you know what…um, your, uh, Mom falls for? The…um, er…thing that…shit. COCK COCK COCK, Lexie!
Meme: This reminds me of the movie, Me and You and Everyone We Know …back and forth.
Lexie: Yeah, but here it was a pair of muppets, not a middle aged woman and a six year old.
Betty: This is the moment when two drunk people are having sex, and sobriety starts setting in. They're disgusted with the vile choice their beer googles have gotten them into, but his cock ring is stuck on her IUD and they can't stop fucking even if they tried. Tragic really.
Jenna: This is obviously a crotch shot from Lexie's, um…movie.
Meme: Hehe…I'm selling that movie at www.girlspoke.com/girls_poked.htm. (How do you think I pay all your salaries? Money doesn't grow on trees people!)
Lexie: HEY. Wait…what? Let me get this straight: I got laid, someone videotaped it, and now you're going to sell it? For PROFIT? Where the fuck was I?
Jenna: You may have been drugged. There was lots of moaning, and your eyes totally rolled back, like, SEVEN times. I forget the other details…anyone else want to fill her in?
Lexie: Daddy, it's not true. Seriously. I swear.
Jenna: What's with the whole dip-your-body-in-chocolate-syrup-for-me-sexy motif?
Meme: Mmmmm, chocolate….oh crap, now I'm breaking out in a rash.
Jenna: Yeah, that's…uh, not from the chocolate, Meme.
Meme: You know, now that I think about it I've been itching ever since I slept in your sleeping bag at the last girlspoke slumber party.
Jenna: Whatever dude. I totally borrowed that shit from Mickey.
Lexie: There was nothing wrong with the sleeping bag after I slept in it…
Jenna: HAHAHA! I've heard lots of slang for hot, sweaty sex, but sleeping is not one of them, Lex.
Casey: Um…the devil?
Betty: Really? I see ducks…
Jenna: Nope. It's an insanely horny set of conjoined twins. (Fused at the ass region.)
Meme: I see ass-fusion all over these pictures.
Lexie: It looks like a "Hear No Evil, See No Evil, Speak No Evil", except with PacMan.
Jenna: So, "PacMan" is your code word for an irregularly shaped penis?
Meme: Ooh! Ooh, ooh! Very impressive!
Jenna: I see Paul Davidson's head.
Lexie: I was going to say the SAME THING. Totally Diddy's head.
Meme: I think Pauly should've been one of the students on Welcome Back Kotter. He could teach Barbarino how to reorganize Mr. Kotter's Betamax collection.
Jenna: Dude, I just had to google effing Betamax, too. Am I stupid or are you just old?
Meme: I'm not old, I'm just retro-chic. Pauly, help me out here.
Last 5 posts by girlspoke staff
- Show us some love - February 14th, 2007
- Meme at Vibrator.com - February 7th, 2007
- Come see our show - January 17th, 2007
- Gobble gobble gobble, burp - November 23rd, 2006
- Listed - November 17th, 2006
Hey, it’s one thing to use the word “deconstructionism” incorrectly–we all let that one fly–but then to start some fucked up rumors about a man’s sleeping bag: that’s just shitty. Especially since I got that sweet little number from the Army Surplus store, and when you say bad things about it you’re inherently talking shit about the poor old stump-legged veteran who originally used it. Besides, obviously it’s so comfortable that Lexie dreamt she got the Mickey treatment, and you don’t need a Rorschach Test to figure out the psychology on that one.
Retro-chic? Naw. You’re just plain chic, Meme.
But stop mentioning Welcome Back Kotter, cause even I couldn’t tell you a damn thing about that show except for what’shisname is in it.
i didn’t say SHIT about getting the “Mickey Treatment”…i just thought i’d go to bat for you and tell the girls that i didn’t get some funky rash from sleeping in your “sweet little number”.
see if i ever stick up for you again there, buddy.
Yeah, Mickey…I believe you should be angry with me. I rumored your fictional sleeping bag’s funk. Of course, I can understand why you’d be terrified to take that stance. I’m extremely hardcore.
Jenna IS hardcore, she can hold her own with the likes of Lexie and Meme. But what’s up Betty?! You got boxed out a few of those ink spots!
Oh yeah, I clicked the link, www.girlspoke.com/girls_poked.htm , but you already knew I would.
))((
Hey, no fair! When I posted my comment, it left out the middle pokey things that showed up in the preview below. It was a reference to Me and You… But, I guess two butts bumping together are even better though. ))(( Or it could be two sets of boobs bumping it. Yeah… that’s what I meant anyway.
Albone - I’ve never been good with pillow flights - I’m always too drunk.
What I want to know is, where was Lexie’s video camera during the pillow fight? Now, that we ALL would have paid good money for!
LOL-u are all fucking brilliant, and I do so love each and every one of you…when is the world tour??
Dude, poor Pauly D! Sure his melon’s hefty, but he’s no Horshack.
And though the discourse was intriguing (”fucking brilliant”?? Settle down Sean), the next time you girls pillowfight, mud wrestle or even read by candlelight, a video link would be much appreciated (”where was Lexie’s video camera?” fuckin’A Sean — u my dawg).
Listen Star Effer, if Sean thinks we’re brilliant don’t doubt him…and don’t doubt the power of money and the promise of hot unconditional sex in an unnamed motel.
Star Effer, what’s your problem man?
Meme: Hot unconditional sex? You gals are effing brilliant!
Pauly D: hey doormat in shining armor, if u were paying attention I busted them for making fun of your freakishly large melon… check yo’self
I think we were all hoping for a girly brawl, but I’m kinda hot on the thought of Star Effer and Pauly D now!
fight, fight!!