Stamped: June 29th, 2006 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: around town, cry for help, friends and losers.

It has come down to this. We're afraid we've lost track of some of the girls. You see, the heart-shaped bed is quite big and well, when you leave the nightly head count up to Jenna it seems this is what happens. Damn you Jenna, we told you we had 8 girls…wait 1, 2, 3, 4…fuck someone get the calculator.

If Meme hadn't seized all their passports when they joined girlspoke we'd be afraid they'd never return. But it seems letting them wander the streets alone to sell girlspoke key chains with sign language cards was a bad idea.

Though we must caution you that these girls are considered armed with sex toys and dangerously intoxicated. If you spot either, call Meme; she will send out Heather and Jenna, properly equipped with latex suits and whips, to retrieve them.

Any tips that lead to the safe return of our heart-shaped-bed companions will recieve a MAJOR AWARD. This award may consist of, but is not limited to, lap dances, verbal assault, inappropriate comments (if you're underage), and possibly a drink tossed into your lap. Of course, this is all negotiable as suggested by our Girlspoke lawyers.

Rizzo, Molly, if you're listening: We miss you. We miss the way you play with your martini olives. We miss the way you hold our hair back on a Saturday night, or morning for that matter. And mostly, we miss the income you brought into the Girlspoke apartment. Jenna's pittance pay is doing jack for our weekly liquor requirements. We all pinky swear not to spank you too hard if you just come on back. Like now. Seriously. Did we mention the liquor?

Last 5 posts by girlspoke staff

• Show us some love - February 14th, 2007
• Meme at Vibrator.com - February 7th, 2007
• Come see our show - January 17th, 2007
• Gobble gobble gobble, burp - November 23rd, 2006
• Listed - November 17th, 2006