Stamped: July 18th, 2006 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: hot sex.

Some say the world may be ending and all these guys keep shooting at each other and blowing stuff up and it's pretty bad, you know?

Just look! Here - Cnn tells me lots of bad things.

Sex is more important now in these times of war than you can ever know. It's simple, really. We're all going to die and we need to be thinking about who our last man on earth sexytime partner will be. Whenever you enter a room, scope out which person you would do if you had to do one person in that room. Be prepared. When emergency or doom strikes, you've got to be ready. Who doesn't want to be moaning away those last precious moments when you inhabit the flesh?

You cityfolk, wrapped up in your ambitions and obsession with boring stuff that involves various suit wearing and being on time for meetings with people you'd rather not meet, as you stand there talking about things you don't care about and never will …

Realize that time is ticking away till there are tender few days that are truly yours and yours alone!
Play with yourself!!!
Put your mouth somewhere cool!
Make that ass bounce!

Don't blow things up- blow your mind- with the power of orgasms.

It's easy math: Apocalypse = Urgent sex

There's nothing more visceral, so before your mind leaves your body, make the most of it.

When life gives you lemons, put em in your pussy.

(You know, if you think it would feel nice, oh I just wanted to say that really … not that I would put lemons in there unless the lemons maybe vibrated or weren't lemons but actually a human penis attached to a nice young man I guess. But if you like the idea of lemons in there then, you know … that's cool. I'm not going to judge or anything.)

PS- You can see me talk kind of like this person if ya like. I'll be performing tonight at Mo Pitkins on Avenue A and 3rd in NYC during Chicks N Giggles at 8pm. More info at www.heatherfink.com.

Last 5 posts by Heather

• On Sexyness - January 24th, 2007
• Goddamn I just really love me some makeup. - January 17th, 2007
• One more reason why nice guys finish last: - January 10th, 2007
• a little somethin special for all the ladies - January 3rd, 2007
• Mathematics of a year - December 27th, 2006