Lo’s Weekly Rant
Stamped: August 3rd, 2006 | Toggle Similar
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Alright my little fuckpuppets, momma’s gonna make this quick. Kinda like your Dad did last night.
I’m at a cafe with NO free wireless (No I’m not in Arkansas, shockingly) and I only have 30 minutes left on my card. I’m also couch surfing at a place with no internet so you might not even get any pretty pictures with this. Fuck, this is a rant in and of itself.
Anyway, so I’m sitting here lamenting about lack of material when it plops right into my lap. I’m sitting beside a couple who are both “working” on something, she on some sort of a non-profit gala project, and him on some website. I can’t help but overhear their conversation and I’m a little alarmed at the familiarity.
Bottom line. Being intelligent is a handicap in dating. Seriously. I know I know, there are plenty of men out there who like smart women, if they don’t like smart women they’re not worth it anyway…blah blah blabitty fucking blah. I guess I should re-phrase. Being smart isn’t a problem, it’s being SMARTER than the man you are DATING that’s a problem. Men LIKE to be asked stupid questions that they can bullshit the answers to, like to be treated like they are the motherfucking Oracle at Delphi and the omniscient little prince that their mothers raised them to believe they are.
Most women have learned this by now but it’s something that I refuse to believe is necessary to adhere to. Ever since middle school when Amy Adamson got all the boys with the cute flick of the blonde hair and the idiotic giggle, I should have known. Then I went to college and believed that there were a plethora of boys out there who believed in conversational equality. I may have found a few, but I don’t think I did their egos any good and they didn’t seem to want to date me for any extended period of time. I’m not saying they aren’t out there, so far I’ve found one, but they’re pretty few and far between.
When I witness the subverting of intelligence for the sake of propping of someone’s ego to get into their bed, it makes me cry a little inside. And then puke in my mouth.
I guess it just reminds me that gender roles haven’t advanced to the degree that we’d all like to believe. Let’s be honest. When was the last time you were at a restaurant and heard some guy earnestly ask his girlfriend to explain the dynamics of cold fusion, or even the reader’s digest of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict? Umm never. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule but the distinction I’m making also lies in the tone and body language. When women “like this” ask their men questions they do it in a doe-eyed, I’m so simple – learn me! Kind-of- way. When men ask questions they phrase it as a conversational segue way or do it in an unbearably condescending way.
The funny thing is to sit there with guys who are laboring under the misapprehension that you are less intelligent than them. In fact it seems necessary to their ego’s very survival. They do a wonderful little peacock dance with the minor assemblage of brain cells the DO have but in the end you can’t help but giggle a little to yourself.
God I’m such a bitch. I love it.
Okay, so didn’t mean to get all Feminism 101 on your asses but I think it is important to step back for a sec and see how we interact with the opposite sex. The cues we give and the social conventions we adhere to for the sake of fluidity and comfort. I’m certainly no saint, I’m sure I’ve dumbed down on occasion but we have to realize how we’re helping perpetuate a problem when we do this.
In other words, take some responsibility. Be the smart, confident, Mensa worshipping bitch that you are.
Last 5 posts by Lo
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Amen sister.
Point taken. But really, it makes it so much more satisfying when you finally DO find someone who is your conversational equal and who recognizes that equality. I love the foreplay of not just a good debate but also feeding off another brain, so to speak.I like the feeling that i am ‘keeping up’ with someone intelligent. (and i wonder if that in itself makes me a ditz… oh well..)
Never had a problem in that department. In fact, last night, I went to a female friend’s place so she could teach me a computer program. And I actually become less interested in a woman if she isn’t intelligent. So take heart — there are those of us guys who find big brains attractive too.
that’s right, the women are smarter…
we were playing some electronic word game the other night, and one of the guys had to take off mid-game. a female friend hopped in his place and she helped us kick ass. needless to say, i now have a crush on a married friend.
Wait, there are women who are less intelligent then me? I can’t believe my Mom would lie to me like that!
“Men LIKE to be asked stupid questions that they can bullshit the answers to…”
That’s going to be my blog’s unofficial mission statement!
Go FEMS! Is a sports chant inappropriate?
Nevermind…
No Useless Man, sports chants are not inappropriate, in fact I’d wager I can kick your ass at sports too;)
Lazy J - you’re mom lies like a rug…sorry bro.
As for the rest of you, I completely agree that there are some men out there capable of recognizing that some women MAY be smarter than them (and actually enjoying it). However, much like a short man without a napoleon complex….they’re hard to find. But when you do, it’s nothing short of hot. Word.
Eh….what? I always thought girls were smarter (and not as lazy) than guys. I figured it was a given, kind of like the sun rising. I know a lot of girls that do a lot of stupid things, but for the most part are smarter than most guys I know.
And what’s wrong with propping ego? No one really gets hurt, except your own ego.
Pffft, and next you’ll tell me that Brad and Jennifer are breaking up…..
Men know we’re smarter than them, so we don’t have to brag about it. I often find that a simple batting of the eyes and a “can you open this jar for me?” works wonders on the male psychie. I’m as pro-women-rule-the-world-and-should-be-treated-fairly-and-equally as the next chick, but you have to play a bit weak to advance. Like you gotta spend money to make money, but not.
I once dated a guy who got really pissed off at me because I could do the word scramblers at the beginning of the movies faster than him. Two weeks later, done. Oh well - his loss!
Can you teach me the principles of cold fusion? I never quite caught on, and must admit, that’s really hot!
I know most men (including the undersigned) like their egos flattered but stupid questions???? First what is the standard for a stupid question? Wasn’t that the question already answered which needs no further repetition? If I suspect my gf of asking me a stupid question only with the purpose to make me feel superior I’ll have a serious chat with her. I think it is a great turn on if a girl is asking me a challenging question - I don’t get mad but I get attracted
Well said. I find that the stereotypical tunnel vision of masculinity seems to be magnified in conversational (potentially intimate) scenarios. Too often the ability to spit textbook facts back is viewed as intellect in society in general. I think that it’s not just a male - female issue, but a social acceptance of pseudo-intelligence.
That and, females are often better at varied / abstract / multitracked conversation due to brain wiring, so often males are hard up catching onto to the ideas, much less intelligently digesting them - on the fly.
thank fuck, someone’s finally come up with something true about dating!!
hey, I guess I have to kind of disagree here - and then agree right away - again: well I think being supid helps for both on first dates, because who wants to talk something serious on the first dates. you want to have fun, or get right to it. so long live smalltalk. have you never realized that in many women’s online profile being funny / making me laugh is a main quality in a guy. Or is funny and stupid not the same? hrmm quite often it is I guess. Say not stupid, say superficial, I think that’s what we are talking about.
So yes, right
However, being totally stupid is a turn off, and I tell you why, because you think, hang on, if she is this stupid now, how will she be in bed later? being difficult, not talking about certain things, you know what I mean…
On the other hand, we germans day - stupid fucks well - so maybe, and then again with most intelligent women who are quite often strong characters as well, sex can be boring too, because they cannot let loose, wont be sumissive, but cant be dominant either, because that would be ridiculous,.
you get me?
not sure what I am really saying, maybe that both extremes are bad?
guess so