Stamped: December 26th, 2006 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: holiday hijinks.

I am in Georgia for Christmas. A week at my dad's house with a full fridge, a car for me to drive outside, CABLE IN EVERY ROOM…..

And relatives who say hilariously inappropriate things to me.

I should preface this by saying that I am the odd one out in my family. First off, I have the voice of a white girl named Tiffany. Also, I had a lot of white friends growing up–I was usually the only black person in my classes so I made friends with the people I was around. My family has never understood my voice, my friends, my taste in music, my taste in clothes, and of course, they are completely taken aback by the fact that I usually date white guys. And not just any white guy but a type–I like them tall, lanky, with curly brown hair and glasses. It's been that way since I fell in love with Nicholas Northcutt in second grade. I've dated all kinds of guys but if I am digging on someone, he probably has all of the aforementioned characteristics.

But anyway.

My family always has something to say and here's some of what cracked me up during our Christmas festivities today.

My Aunt
My Aunt: "Girl, I have been watching this wedding thing on TLC and I am ready for if you want to marry a Jew."

My other aunt (during dinner to my mom as if I wasn't sitting across the table)

Aunt (whispering to my mom): "But really, Rose, why does she talk like that? Still?"
Mom: "I think it's that fast life up in New York."

Kailyn, my 5-year-old niece (while looking at my pictures)

Kailyn: "Why you like glasses so much? I don't LIKE curly hair."
Me: "Why not?"
Kailyn: "Cause I ain't got it! And I want it Bran! I want it like the commercial for curls!!"

My Grandmother
Grandma: "So are you seeing anybody up in New York?"
Me: "Actually, there's this guy I dig"
Grandma: "I"m not gonna even ask if he's white but, Bran, I want you to know that I am better with that since I found Jesus. We all have to live together in heaven, baby."

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday!!

Last 5 posts by Brandy

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