Stamped: December 27th, 2006 | Toggle Similar
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2006 was really truly the year that Heather Fink was single; for the entire year starting on just about the first of January. She’s only 25 years old, so even though she’s been in love (only?) 3 times in her life, she hasn’t been single for a full year since she was 17. And it’s been absolutely magnificent for her.

In this year she has had a real crush on 4 different men. 2 out of the 4 of these men she decided not to call ever again because she didn’t want to be burdened by wanting them any more. For 1 out of those 2 she kept her promise to herself never to call again, only because the other 1 of those 2 men is a parasitic bastard who won’t go away, and she finds his sting endearing, even comforting as she’s grown used to it by now. 3 out of the 4 of these men are people she considers her friends. 1 out of the 3 is still somewhat reliable for activities that go beyond friendship. 4 out of the 4 are still entirely enticing to Ms Fink. 1 out of the 4 is taken and so he is the one she wants the most. He and the parasitic bastard who doesn’t love her and never will.

In this year, Ms Fink has gone on dates with a handful of other men aside from these 4. She hates dates and rarely agrees to them. The idea of a date with someone she barely knows makes her sick to her stomach. She would rather start things off with the physical out of the way first, like a drunken hookup, than to be subjected to small talk or inane banter of any kind. That way the intimate messy cards have already been placed on the table.

A couple of times this year, she reconnected with an ex from a prior year.

A couple of times this year, she kissed someone who is supposed to be just her friend.

A couple of times this year, she cuddled with someone platonically.

For the first time in her life this year, she spent naked time with older men. But these men (2) were exceptionally young at heart. And hot. 1 of them was a movie star. But they just cuddled. Non platonically.

4 men in her personal life heard her cry this year. 1 is an ex. 1 is a friend who has kissed her. 1 is the one that is taken, and the other is the parasitic bastard.

Now it is December and she is not alone. But she is single as ever and she feels defined by the inherent freedom of her status. She feels appreciated by different sets of eyes and ears and cherishes the knowledge that none of them own her. She can’t remember why she might want a committed relationship as though such thoughts have long gone.

But she knows that she likes to be loved. Very much.
She’s more scared by the idea of loving.
She’s got too much to lose.

Welcome 2007. With cheerful, open arms, to your wild and certain uncertainty.

Last 5 posts by Heather

• On Sexyness - January 24th, 2007
• Goddamn I just really love me some makeup. - January 17th, 2007
• One more reason why nice guys finish last: - January 10th, 2007
• a little somethin special for all the ladies - January 3rd, 2007
• The Holidays Are Coming! - December 20th, 2006