Stamped: January 19th, 2007 | Toggle Similar
Tagged: body parts, internet stuff, just plain stupid, news.
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I'm always coming across interesting news stories and copying the link into my bookmarks. I thought today I'd share some of them with you.
I'm all for exercise. But this is fucking ridiculous…
"Children are taught pole dancing"
A Northumberland fitness instructor has defended plans to teach children as young as 12 how to pole dance.
Laraine Riddell will start classes in the New Year at a gym in Choppington, in which boys and girls will be taught to spin up and down on a pole.
[…]"To teach 12-year-old girls pole dancing is out of order. I am sure pole dancing is good exercise - but so is stripping. After all, strippers have great bodies.
"By all means give the kids exercise, but just skip the poles." [via: BBC News]
For me this is up there children's beauty pageants (think Jon Benet) or those exercise classes for high heels, just plain stupid.
You do what you can with the tools that you have…
"Naked Man Arrested for Concealed Weapon"
A man was arrested on suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon after police found him outdoors — naked — and he told them he had a tool in his rectum, authorities said.
[…]John Sheehan, 33, of Pittsburg, was initially arrested on suspicion of indecent exposure. But when asked whether he was carrying anything police should know about, Sheehan mentioned the tool, said El Cerrito Detective Cpl. Don Horgan.
"You can't get much more concealed than that," Horgan said. [via: Newsday]
I sincerely hope he went handle first.
And last but not least…
"First Uterus Transplant in US Being Planned"
Surgeons would transplant a donated uterus into the recipient through an incision just below the navel.
[…]New York Downtown Hospital says doctors will first attempt the procedure on primates in the next three months before any attempt is made on women.
Dr. Giuseppe Del Priore is interviewing possible candidates. "We've spent ten years and thousands and thousands of hours trying to make this as safe as possible. We take it very seriously. And the person who is eventually going to be the first candidate has to have a tremendous understanding of that risk." [via: VOA]
Where do I sign up? Take my uterus, please! (I LOVE that picture.)
*And don't forget Heather, Brandy and I are performing Monday night (and it's FREE!)…click HERE for info.
Last 5 posts by Meme
Meme’s News Clips
1) holy what the fuck? Um I’m actually at a loss for this one.
2)What kind of tool? Are we talk screwdriver or hand drill?
3) Uterus transplants..hhmm, that’s both bizarre and yet no doubt a world of hope for women with crapped out baby ovens. Is there a sign up sheet?
One of the benefits of this site is that it provides human beings who happen to be penised with penetrating insights into the lives of human beings who happen to be non-penised. So, you are telling me that they have classes about how to walk in high heels??? Really??? This is funny.
Of course, what this is all going to lead to is beauty pagents for children where the talent portion consists of pole dancing. I think we should start stockpiling weapons in anticipation of this eventuality.
Tool in rectum? Not to be either unsympathetic or totally gross, but at least it wasn’t a small furry animal of some sort. In that event, I’m sure the local humane society would have been called, and well, it wouldn’t have been pretty. All these PETA people would picket the guy’s house, they’d do clean up like when they wash the oil off of ducks after oil spills, etc., etc.
Um, speaking of uteruses (and by the way, is the plural of “uterus” “uteruses,” or is it “uteri”?): Its always seemed to me that the stylized ram’s head that they use for the logo for the Dodge Ram truck is reminiscent of a uterus and its attachments. Really, the next time you are stuck in traffic behind a Dodge Ram truck, look at the thing with squinty eyes and you’ll see it too. It looks just like the little pink uterus symbol between the two figures above.
I think I’ll start a uterus donation company…as long as we can use the floating steer/uterus as our logo. Anyone want to look into the trademark rights on that one for me?
“Can I rent a uterus and somthing deadly to snuggle into it….please?”